A note every morning

Notes from Jo

On status, power, elegance and the small habits that decide how a room treats you. Written by a grandmother who learned the rules the long way round.

NOTES FROM JO · CLASSNo. 22Jo
class9 min read

Three Things Never to Discuss at Dinner

Money, health and other people's marriages. Everything else is fair game. Here are the exact words I use when a table starts drifting towards one of the three.

NOTES FROM JO · WEALTHNo. 21Jo
habits8 min read

How to Think Like Old Money (A Mindset, Not a Portfolio)

He read his hotel bill line by line while a queue formed behind him. I thought he was counting pennies. I had it the wrong way round.

NOTES FROM JO · LEGACYNo. 20Jo
family history9 min read

Why Keep a Journal? Write Things Down, Because Your Notes Will Outlive You

On the corner of my desk sits a brown leather book the size of my palm. Everything I know about rooms, and the people who own them, started in it.

NOTES FROM JO · CLASSNo. 19Jo
class9 min read

Dinner Party Etiquette: The Rules Nobody Explains

From the reply to the invitation to the note the morning after: the dinner party rules nobody explains, for men and women, modern and never stuffy.

NOTES FROM JO · STATUSNo. 18Jo
old money8 min read

Quiet Luxury Isn't a Look. It's a Behaviour.

A young woman at a hotel bar asked me if my coat was quiet luxury. The coat is twenty-two years old. What she wanted to buy can't be bought; it has to...

NOTES FROM JO · PRESENCENo. 17Jo
confidence8 min read

Move Quickly, Speak Slowly

The people who own the room move quickly and speak slowly. Most of us do it the other way round, and the room can hear it.

NOTES FROM JO · POWERNo. 16Jo
detachment8 min read

Never Chase: The Rule That Got Me Out

I didn't slam a door. I stopped running for the bus. The story of the rule that got me out, and how to use it on anyone you're tired of chasing.

NOTES FROM JO · TIMENo. 15Jo
discipline8 min read

The Morning Routine of Quietly Successful People

For a year I got up at a quarter to five and was unbearable by nine. The morning that works is ten minutes long, and most of it happens on paper.

NOTES FROM JO · WEALTHNo. 14Jo
habits8 min read

Old Money Habits: Wealth Is a Habit Long Before It's a Number

Turn your shoes over and look at the heels. The habits of old money start there, a long way before anything to do with a bank.

NOTES FROM JO · LEGACYNo. 13Jo
character8 min read

How to Be a Gentleman: The Rules My Grandmother Wrote for Men Too

The finest door-holder I ever knew also kept the only set of keys. Eleven rules for the modern gentleman, none of which involve a cape or a puddle.

NOTES FROM JO · CLASSNo. 12Jo
class9 min read

How to Write a Thank-You Note People Keep

Write it by hand, send it within two days, and mention one thing only you would have noticed. Everything else is stationery.

NOTES FROM JO · STATUSNo. 11Jo
manners9 min read

Old Money vs New Money: The Differences Nobody Says Out Loud

A stranger on a train asked me if I could tell old money from new by looking. Usually, I said. But I never look at the money.

NOTES FROM JO · PRESENCENo. 10Jo
elegance8 min read

How to Be Elegant: Habits of Effortlessly Elegant People

My grandmother judged a coat from the inside. Elegance works the same way: ten small habits, for men and women, that nobody can sell you.

Don't just read the notes. Live them for ninety nights.

Ninety nights from now you'll be ninety nights older either way. The only question is whether you'll have the pages to show for it.

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